The Fairer Sex...and Its Need for Drama

As sisters in Christ, we are commanded to love one another. Heck, as the body of Christ, we are called to love one another. 1 Corinthians 13 states that "Love is patient and kind...It doesn't insist in its own way...Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." (ESV)
Why, when communication becomes stale and conflict arises, do we immediately look inside ourselves and check out our own moral compass? "How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye,' when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother's eye." (Luke 6:42, ESV) I agree that you need to confirm that you, yourself, do not have any sins hindering you from helping a sista out...but! You need to be aware of how consumed you become with yourself. Do not become a self-oriented sista who thinks that her other friend can deal with her own mess and the conflict will just go away in time. Why do no we not, instead, run to that other person and beg her to let us help her in her time of need?
If there is a conflict between two(or more) people, why can't they run to one another and pray for each other/ love on one another/ challenge each other/ etc?
In all the major conflicts in my life with people, I have had to sincerely get lost in the Lord's Word before I could truly love on the other person and reconcile. My selfishness blinded me from looking out for the other person. Instead, I would hide inside myself and build this wall of insecurity, wondering "what did I do?" and "why can't I be a better friend?"
This is so stupid! These thoughts are about ME. My actions were about me. If I stepped out to "help" my friend, I would just be acting in guilt. Until I asked for discernment and asked the Lord for help in reconciling with my friend, I could not truly love on my friend.
Ephesians 4:26 says, "In your anger, do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on your anger." (NIV)
In conflict, allow love to lead you to confront or confess, admonish (v. to caution, advise, or counsel against wrongdoing or ), and ultimately/prayerfully, reconcile. If you desire to reconcile, you're pointed in the right direction. Peace